Family

So, I've been thinking a lot lately after hearing the news of Grandma's sister not doing so well. We all call her Aunt Jeanne, grandma calls her Jeanne, I won't mention what my grandfather called her! :-) Grandma has mentioned MANY times of how she grew up in her family as the dumb one, or different one, or silly one. She talks about how her sister was always so perfect, yet she was far from it. But, there are times she will say "Who would want to be perfect? That's no fun!" I guess it depends on her mood. Grandma grew up with her two brothers and sister and was always the one with "dirty" feet, lower grades, straight knotty hair, etc. She likes to describe herself almost like a misfit. But, that is not what we, as a family, sees. I know she will tell you different, but she was a wonderful child...full of love! That love stuck with her throughout her marriage, raising children, and now into her not-so-young-anymore years. She loves her parents, loves her siblings, loves her husband and children, and so forth. But, the best part of that is it shows! What a wonderful woman she became. I can't help but feel that all those imperfections she feels she had, came together to form such a beautiful heart to share amongst all us family. When my grandfather died, Grandma was surrounded my her children, grandchildren, cousins, siblings, nieces, nephews, friends, in laws, etc. Anyone you could ever imagined gathered around my grandmother to not only support her, but each other. That is how they were brought up, mainly because of her. But, then I see my great aunt, grandma's only sister unfortunately barely hanging on to her life. See, Aunt Jeanne is missing that special spark of love that grandma has. Or, if she has it it's not shining through like grandma's. She never married, never had children, never really showed how much love she really had to give to anyone. I saw first hand when she lived with my parents how different she was from my grandma. But, I guess it's unfair to compare because after all I don't know many people who are as full of love and hope as grandma. So, yes...I feel bad for my great aunt. She is missing out on TONS of family gathering for her...but it's not that I don't care. It's more so I felt as though she was not the most kind and gentle to my family and I (meaning my parents, sister, and I). I choose to forgive her for all her unkind acts towards my parents and even my grandparents. Do I love my great aunt? Absolutely. After all, my grandmother taught my mom, and my mom taught me how to love, even when it isn't felt in return. I feel awful that only a few of my aunts/uncles have gone to visit my great aunt. I just feel as though, if I was to visit it would be out of pity, not out of love. I'm more than happy to support my grandmother as she mourns the upcoming loss of her sister. My aunt deserves to be surrounded by people that truly love and care for her. One of those people is definitely my grandmother. She loves her sister to the moon and back, but will not forget how she treated her and her husband. See, if everyone could just be taught the lesson of love and how to truly show it, we all could be as loved as my grandmother. I know the day (hopefully many years to come) my grandmother will eventually die, she would be around more family and friends you could ever imagine. I look at that as a goal for myself as well. To not die alone...to be surrounded by people I love and that love me back. Grandma, thank you for showing me the true meaning of love. It has got to be one of the best life lessons I've learned yet. And to Aunt Jeanne, my thoughts and prayers are with you through your struggle. I hope you find peace and hope in the weeks to come.